Love is properly defined as committing to do the best for someone.
Explanation
There are lots of silly and stupid definitions for love. All of them are wrong unless it matches this one.
Love is not a feeling. It is not a state of mind. It is not a desire. It is not a tingly sensation in the loins. It is not affection. It is not an expression. It is not an action by itself. It is not even a habit or an attitude.
Love is a commitment, a solemn promise carried out, to do the best for someone. You can love strangers just as well as you can love your spouse or even yourself. You can love briefly or for a lifetime. The amount and type of love shown will differ in each case, but there’s no special qualifier or condition required to love.
Just wanting to show love is not love. Love is only love when it is acted out.
On the other hand, an action alone is not love either, just a deed. Without commitment, an action lacks the intention to do what’s best and the follow through to make sure it is best.
If you commit to love someone, it will stretch through every notion of love we have that is appropriate to that commitment. If you love your wife, you have gone so far as to speak an oath and sign legal paperwork to keep that commitment, but if you stopped there, you would fail your commitment. It must be a habit you cultivate toward your wife and an attitude of love toward her. It must be followed through with action. It must be expressed regularly. It will be shown through affection and feelings of desire. It will permeate your state of mind. You will feel love toward her.
It is unlikely that you will be doing all of these well at all times in your marriage, but the commitment should draw you on to improve in any place where you are weak. This is love.
Toward a child, the execution will look different, but the commitment should be as strong. Toward a friend, it will, again, be its own kind of love, but the commitment is still very important. Toward a neighbor or enemy, the commitment becomes more about committing to God to do your very best to serve and show charity in whatever ways you are able, but it is driven out of commitment nonetheless.